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Thanks for coming along with me to the grocery store, Halan; it was really sweet of you.
Aw, I enjoy spending time with you. So what are we looking for, exactly? Ooh, hot dog sandwich slices!
Well, the managers at Chez la Stupidname-
-you guys have the best duck head! Wait, that's Foley's...
Only if you capitalize it: Duck Head. Then you're talking about the clothing brand. Otherwise, you're referring to a dish that Chez la Stupidname doesn't even make...
Oh, true. So what do the managers do, again?
You don't know what managers do?
No, I-
-I can't believe you don't know what a manager does!
You were saying something about them!
Yeah, but don't I need to explain what a manager is first?-
-I know what a manager does!!
Well, you don't have to yell at me!
Ooh, garlic bean dip!
So, anyway, the managers want a new "special of the week" every week!
Every week?
Every week.
Can't you make a new "special of the week" every month? That'd be a lot easier!
Well, then it wouldn't be a "special of the week"!
Oh, how about elephant casserole?
No! Ellie is running away!!
Faster, Ellie!
Come back here!!
I sure hope they don't knock down that beautiful stack of an arbitrary choice of canned fruits we saw a few aisles back!
A high-speed-
-magical!
-pink!
-cute!
elephant running through a grocery store with an angry Sailor Scout in hot pursuit is more than likely to hit some stack of canned items. Ooh, oddly-shaped noodles!
The odds are 76.42% that the high-speed, magical, pink, cute elephant will hit the cans!
Why is everyone interrupting our episode!?! C'mon, Halan! We're migrating to frozen foods!
But it's so cold over there!
The only people that haven't bugged us are Raye and Darien. Oh, yeah, those cats, too!
And now let's flash over to Darien's apartment!
Please! Let me go!
Hmm... you don't look quite like Dar yet!
This loincloth is embarrassing!
Well, isn't it better than no underwear?
Not without pants and a shirt!
I wonder if the woodsmith is done making your swallow yet...
What in the frickin' world is a swallow?!?
That stick thing that the Beastmaster always fights with! It's like Serge's from Chrono Cross.
I don't want to wield a swallow!
Oh! Oh! We need to lighten your hair! That's what's missing! Where's Serena's color-in-a-box?
Her hair color's fake?!?
You didn't know she was a bleacher?
Well, at least I'm not a whole stadium, Raye!
Umm...
And now back to the grocery store...
That was disturibing. And to respond to your suggestion, Halan, I will not cook elephants for Chez la Stupidname! What's all that junk in my shopping basket?!?
Oddly-shaped noodles, garlic bean dip, and hot dog sandwich slices!
With a little rosemary and parsley on the side, and a few shiitake mushrooms... That'd be the perfect "special of the week"! Thanks, Halan! I've got to go check out and cook this before I lose the recipe stirring in my mind!
Bye! Wait... does this mean I don't get to eat my oddly-shaped noodles, my garlic bean dip, or my hot dog sandwich slices?
Sailor Mars Says: When I'm through with Darien, I'll have my very own Beastmaster!
Help me!
Oh no! I can't stop! Canned food!
Ew! Peaches! Thousands of peaches!
Oh, I'm in the opening credits, now! I'm so happy!
It's a great day when an elephant is happy.
Is it a horrible day when an elephant is sad?
Yes, because we step on people. Now get back to stapling!
Yes, Ellie.
I'll see you later, Molly! You too, Ellie!
Yep, we have a lot of work to do!
Why do they have so much work to do?
Mina!! Where'd you come from?
Oh, I don't have anything to do, so I thought I'd come to the NYU admissions office and meet you.
But what about the still-unnamed coffee shop?
Answer my question and I'll answer yours.
Oh, well, we trashed the campus a few episodes back, so there's been a lot of repair work going on. They've been having to order new gymnasiums, sidewalks, trees, even dormitories.
Don't those take a while to be built?
Oh, no, they're ordering them directly from a construction factory. It's much faster that way.
But why is the admissions office doing this?
Well, we accidentally beheaded most of the other secretaries and deans when we went rampant.
And nobody arrested you?!? For murder?
Well if they don't exist, we didn't murder them!
I'm not sure I can associate with you anymore...
Come back!
I have to get away! Oh no-
Ouch! Was that a speed bump?
Horizontal rule. We blew up the computer engineering department, too. The horizontal rules and algorithms landed everywhere.
Recursion. Recursion.
Now tell me why you aren't waitressing and managing!
Well the woman that Raye gave the keys too... Well, she kinda, um, stole the coffeeshop...
Oh my gosh! How much did she steal?
She stole the actual coffeeshop. She left all the couches, money, coffee, and so forth. There's just no... building left.
No walls?
Right.
What about the floor? And ceiling?
Just dirt underneath. And there's no ceiling, just the floor of the second story of the building above it.
So you closed it down?
I tried. But there was no way to lock it up. Then all the pikachus infested the place...
Pikachus?
Yes, Pikachus. More jolt than my coffee.
No, Pikachu.
Yes, Pikachus.
Pika-CHU!
You're not a pikachu! Stop talking like one!
"Pikachu" is a Japanese word! And seeing how the two of you are from Japan, one would think you would know that Japanese plurals don't end in "s"! They're the same as the singular versions!
Um...
Oh my!
Serena! Mina! We must hurry!
Pikachu!
Silence!
Wow... You can kick Artemis pretty far.
Yes, I know. But we must hurry!
Why? What's going on?
Lita is about to unveil her newest creation at Chez la Stupidname, and you agreed to be there, remember?
Not really... When did I say I'd be there? Not that I mind being there, but I just don't remember agreeing to be there.
Last week.
Oh! No wonder I don't remember! We didn't have an episode last week!
And I'm kind of surprised that we have one this week... This isn't funny at all!
Do all of our episodes have to be funny?
What episodes?!? What are you talking about?!?
There you are, Raye! It's your fault that the pikachu have infested the coffee shop!
Who? Me?
You owe me a coffee shop!
Hey, I'm not the one who up-and-left the country!
Venus, Catepillar, Smash!!
Wow, she can summon heavy machinery! I wish that I were Sailor Venus...
But you can actually destroy villains with your tiara, remember?
Blah, blah. Let's go eat.
Hurry, before the disgusting dish becomes cold!
Yipes! I'd fight you, but I have more important things to worry about right now!
Like what?
Yipes!
Oh, sorry. Steamroller, desist!
My very own Beastmaster!!
Um... Don't you think you're taking this whole Beastmaster fandom thing a little too seriously?
Never! I must go buy hair color now!
Um... Great, now I'm stuck with all of this heavy machinery! Wait... Steamroller, crane, bulldozer, forklift! Follow me to the coffee shop!
Amy...?
What?!?
I know you're still upset about NYU, but...
Don't forget getting trapped in the walk-in freezer!
Yes... That too... But why are all those construction vehicles advancing toward our building?
Ah, so we are in the same bulding as the coffee shop!
Well, for this week at least!
Sailor Venus Says: Attack!!!
Are we ending the episode already? Does that mean that I don't have to eat Lita's creation?
Hurry, Serena!
Back to stapling!
I guess the episode's not over quite yet...
I don't care! Those Pikachu will pay! Go bulldozer! Go steamroller! Take that!
Those are some flat Pikachus!
Pika-CHU!
Flying cat!! Whew! It landed down on the ground!
Sailor Mercury Says: That's one flat Artemis!
Melvin, haven't we been meaning to get married for over a year now?
Yes, I think so.
Well, we need to hurry up and do it before this season ends!
This season has been going on for several years... I don't think it will end...
Well I'm impatient! So sue me!
Do you want to play a few rounds of Quake?
Yes I do! I'll be back!
Uh... why's the penthouse shaking?!?
Quake?
In New York?!? Oh no...
What's going on? Why's everything shaking?!?
Ack! Serena! Stop throwing up!!
And I thought Lita was a good cook... I guess not...
It could be motion sickness!
We have to get out of here!
Give me a second...
Serena! Stop throwing up this instant!
Don't make me come back there!!
C'mon!!
Okay, I'm done... Amy, why are you flying?
The penthouse must be falling!!
I'm scared... Where's the couch?
I threw up on it...
*Yawn* What's going on?
It's about time you woke up from your cat-nap! We're falling!
That's not a good thing.
Oh! We're passing the ground!!
We've stopped falling!
But now our penthouse is underground!
So much for the view. Should we move?
At the moment, I'm slightly more concerned about what happened.
How are you going to get out?
Hmm...
That's right! The lobby is underground now and doesn't lead to anywhere!
Everyone else has already figured that out, Serena.
Oh, insult Serena! She's so stupid that she won't get the jokes!
What's that all over the couch?
Bile?
Sarcasm?
That's it! I'm going to go be by myself!
Where?
The roof!
The roof!
Stop repeating what I say!
No! That's how we'll get out of here! We'll take the stairs to the roof and get out that way!
Yeah, because you can fly?
You stay here! I'm going to the roof!
No! Amy! DOn't do it!
Don't do what?
Jump off the roof!
You idiot! If we've fallen underground, then that means the roof leads onto the street!
Oh.
Why would I jump off the roof of a building? If I'm distraught I can simply give you a swirly!
True.
Here I go! And...
What's the matter Amy?
What's wrong?
Yeah, tell us!
Why are you following me?!?
We don't want to be in there by ourselves! It smells bad in there!
You're the one who threw up, Serena.
What if we fall down again?
Okay. Anyway... There are a bunch of floors above us now!
The elevator!
Aren't they broken?
That was a month or two ago, Serena!
But that was just a few episodes ago...
Gemini6Ice hasn't had a lot of time to write episodes lately, Serena. You need to get over it.
Oh my!
What's wrong?
There's a hole in the floor of the elevator! And the lights are all on the floor!
And all the buttons are upside down! What could this mean?
You're both idiots. Serena, I can understand why you are, but Melvin! You're a nerd! You're supposed to be intelligent!
He's just a dork. A geek. Not a nerd.
3.1415926535
Oh! You just don't have common sense! Well, here's the deal: The elevator is obviously upside-down! The hole in the floor is the escape hatch that was once on the ceiling. And for some reason the floor order has been reversed, and we're now at the bottom of the building! Which means the roof leads underground as well!
I don't understand!
We're trapped in this building forever!
No! Because the order of the floors has been reversed, the lobby is now on the top, and it still leads onto the street! We're free!
Everyone in!
Why are you doing a headstand, Serena?
So I can read the buttons! To the lobby!
Staring at the floor numbers seems really silly when they're upside-down and at the bottom of the elevator.
Everyone out! We're free!
Hey guys!
Hey! The coffeeshop... It looks great! Like a cafe!
Yep, once I smashed all of the Pikachus-
Pikachu!
Do I have to kick you again?
No. I'll be quiet now. I promise.
I redecorated the place! And we're now open for business again!
But what happened? Why did I throw up?
I thought that you and Luna went to go eat Lita's "special of the week."
I remember going there... But I don't remember being there...
She's suffering the loss of any memories that didn't occur during an episode!
Oh, by the way, sorry about the whole knocking-down-your-building thing.
That was you?
Yeah, one of the steamrollers accidentally hit a pillar and everything just started falling. I ran off until the dust cleared, and then I cleaned up.
You ruined our penthouse's beautiful view!
I'm sorry! But, you see, now we have the coffeeshop to hang out in again!
First I get rejected from NYU! Then I get trapped in a walk-in freezer! Then my building falls down! That's it! Mercury, Star, Power!!
Run! Run, Mina!
Wow, we have a lot of mail... Here's a letter from NYU...
Amy! You've been accepted! All you have to do is send them three packages of staples by next week, and you're in!
Really? Wow! I'm so happy!
I'm so saved!
Sailor Moon Says: Don't you just love happy endings?
I've done it! I've finally done it! Nobody can stop me now!!
Anyway... Where's my coffee?!?
Serena...
What?
Serena.
What?!?
Serena!
Wha-a-at!?!
You didn't order any coffee!
Well, can I order some then?
I'm still hiring people! Wait a day or two!
I've waited two weeks! That's it! I'm going on the subway!
I want to come!
Yes! So do I!
I wouldn't mind trvalleing underground with you guys!
...
Halan!
What?
Oh! They're playing our game, Mina!
I'm waiting to be called for an interview! I hope I'm next! I need a job!
Dorothy Biteme? Dorothy Biteme? I'm ready to interview you now!
All right! I hope I land this job!
Poofoo.
Wait... wasn't she the one at that restaurant? Dorothy! Yoohoo!
Yes? It's you! I'll kill you!!
Eep! Somebody save me!
Head for the subway! I'll stop this miscreant!
I lost my job because of you and that guy you were with that night! Nobody walks out of that restaurant! And when you did, my boss thought it was because of me! I've been homeless for over a year because of you!!
Hey! I recognize you...
Run, Halan, run!!
Spinning tray!!
Oomph! Now I'll never get the job!
Why not?
I'm about to pass out! Oh here I go-
Stop it this instant, young lady!
Ouch! You bit me!
Hmm... I guess she doesn't want the interview...
Wait! Yes I do! Yes I do!
Halan? Is Halan here?
(I'm unconscious now. Poofoo.)
I lost my interview because of you, too!
Hey! It's not my fault you attacked us!
Actually...
Don't you even care that your boyfriend is unconscious?
He'll wake up. And I've got a subway token burning a hole in my pocket.
Huh? What is it, Lita?
Oh, right, I almost forgot! You tried to get her attention, so it kind of is your fault that she attacked us.
In that case...
Run!!!
Come back here!!
Allegra Fontaine? Is there an Allegra Fontaine waiting to be interviewed?
Oh no! The subway doors are about to close!
Juuuuuuummp!!
Oomph!
Hey guys... What's going on? Um, why is that woman pounding on the subway doors?
It's the crazy waitress, Dorothy... Dorothy... What was her last name?
Biteme.
Don't be so rude, Molly!
What are you up to, Raye?
I can't believe it! Dorothy is actually chasing our subway!
Oh, look, there comes another one!
Ouch!
Poor Dorothy.... Poor Dorothy.... What was her last name?
Biteme.
A waitress was just run down by a subway! This is no time to be rude, Molly!
This subway car is so dirty...
Stop licking the subway, Luna!
It's what we cats do! When something is dirty, we lick it clean...
Well, it's really gross, so stop it!
Oh! I've got another one: That adds a whole new meaning to 2-D!
I don't get it...
Well? Are you going to answer me, Raye?
Oh, right sorry! I was just thinking of my new boyfriend!
Oh! You got a boyfriend?!?
Well, I admit, I made him what he is today... He owes me!
So... when do we get to meet him?
He was just here a second ago... Honey, where'd you go?
Where?
There you are! Why are you hiding?
I can't believe it...
To be continued!!!
Come on! You can't just leave us hanging!
Yep! It looks like we won't find out about Raye's new boyfriend until next week!
Drats!
Sailor Moon Says: Oh! My! The flattened Dorothy... Dorothy...
Biteme.
Be quiet, Molly! I'm in the middle of ending the episode!
Sorry.
Anyway... She's still chasing our subway! Step on it, subway-driver guy!!
Okay! It's the next episode now! Do we get to find out about Raye's boyfriend?
Yes we do! And.... action!
I can't believe it! Your boyfriend is...
Help me.
He's pretty hot.
I know! Isn't he great?!?
Raye... Can I get off the subway yet? Please?
Wait... I recognize that voice!
Hey! I thought we were watching the waitress chase our subway!
I have more important things to do, Molly! Now, if you'll excuse me... Darien?
Serena! Ouch! Eeeyagh!!
Darien!! What's wrong? Why do you look like the Beastmaster?
I'm...
I still have the remote control...
I am the Beastmaster...
What?
Now, Dar, didn't we discuss the names you're allowed to respond to? Remember, every time you respond to the name "Darien," the electric shocks will get worse.
Raye, is this Darien?
Of course he's not! He's Dar! The Beastmaster! Maybe he was Darien, a long time ago. But things change...
Turn him back into Darien! This instant!
Dar?
I'm not Darien! I'm Dar! I'm the Beastmaster! Don't tell my, um, lover to change me! You have no right to dictate who I should be.
Good answer. No shocks. Now convince her that you never were Darien!
Raye used a magical spell on the TV and I came to life! Just because I sound like this "Darien" doesn't mean I am him! I mean, that's preposterous! I look nothing like him!
Yikes!
I seem to be flying!
Ouch!
Oomp!
What happened?
The subway's stopped! I wonder why?
Oh no!
What is it?
Ellie!
Now the waitress will catch up to us!
Oh, yeah, that too!
Dar! Save the helpless girls!
We're Sailor Scouts! We can save ourselves!
They do have a point, Raye. Ouch! Eeyagh!!
Shut up and save us all!
We can do it ourselves! Hey, where'd Molly go?
Molly! I insist you stop trying to open those subway doors yourself! You'll never manage it!
Hey! Stop looking at us, you stupid subway passengers! We're cooler than you, and you know it!!
As I was saying, Raye, all we have to do is transform and we can stop that evil Dorothy... Dorothy...
Biteme.
Do you really want me to, Molly? Now, I insist you listen to me!
But wouldn't you rather see Dar running around in his loincloth?
Good point. Oh, we're helpless!
*Sigh* Fine... Ouch! Eeyagh!!
Be enthusiastic about helping them!
I'll take care of this problem!
Woot!
I've finally caught up to you guys! Let me in this subway car!
Never! Ha-ha!
Spinning tray!
I wonder how much those plexiglass windows cost, anyhow...
You're dead meat, blondie!
Yay! Now I can crawl out the window and help Ellie!
Stop right there!
What?
Not you. The girl wielding a tray.
Oh. Ellie, I'm coming!!
*Weakly* Molly... Is that you?
Ellie! Speak to me!
I am... speaking...
Speak to me!
Shut up... and let... me... speak!
Okay, I'm listening, Ellie.
You've been a great friend, a wonderful jockey, and an amazing employee...
You're vanishing!!
I've been injured... by this device...
What device?
The one... that... hit... me...
Oh! The subway! But you'll be okay!
No, I am going to...
Ellie! No!
I followed... a trail of peanuts... They led... me... here... and then... I got hit by this... subway.
Molly... May your life be great...
Ellie! Nooooo!!! You're disappearing!
Molly! Get back here!
You get back here first!
I'll just climb through this window too! Ergh-ugh... I'm stuck!
Take that, you tipless tramp!
Spinning tray!!
Is that her only attack? What a loser!
Serena! Get out of that window this instant!
I'm trying Luna! It's so windy out here! Oh, look, mole-people!
Wiggle your butt while you fight, Dar!
Woot!
Wield that swallow!
Mmm... he can swallow my wield any day...
No he can't! He's my boyfriend! He's gonna swallow my wield!
There's no such thing as a wield! That doesn't make any sense!
Hah!
Oomph! Oh no!
And now you're a miniature figurine of what you once were!
A Dorothy figurine? For me! Thank you!
Since when can the Beastmaster turn enemies into toys?
Hey, when you make your own Beastmaster, you can stick to the original! Mine's even better! So there!
Can we save Serena from the window?
No.
I shouldn't've eaten those doughnuts...
Sailor Jupiter Says: I want my own Beastmaster now!
What about Halan?
He's unconscious right now. And besides, Dar is so much hotter.
(Poofoo.)
Stop! We can't end the episode yet! What about Ellie?
She's gone! Now we're ending the episode!
Don't you even care!?!
I've never met her... Sailor Jupiter Says-
We have to save her!
Molly!
What? Oh Ellie! You're alive!
No, I'm the ghost Ellie.
We really need to end the episode, guys!
You can't be dead! I'll miss you too much!
Well, I am dead. Get over it.
How can you say that?!?
See, she agrees with me. Now, Sailor Jupiter-
How can you not care that you're dead?
Molly, I'm disappointed in you...
Why? Because I wasn't hit by the subway too?
Have you forgotten already?
Forgotten what?!?
I'm a magical elephant. I'll be alive again by next week.
Oh. So I'm stuck here in the subway by myself for no reason at all?
Yes, that's about right.
I wonder how far it is to the surface...
Are we done here?
Yeah, I think so. Bye, ghost-of-Ellie!!
Finally! Sailor Jupiter Says: Yeah, um, the episode's over. Get used to it.
Are those... mole-people?!? Somebody help me!!!
Sorry. Episode's over!
No! No! Not yet! No-
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